Canned Heat!

Below you will find the results of my having challenged myself for a number of days to write a short story with a beginning and middle and an end inside of 30 minutes. Here is what I came up with. I hope you like it.

Leroy hid behind the gravestones and tried to scare the vampires as they arose. It only worked some of the time. It was difficult to become a vampire.

Leroy felt the vampires would become used to him, and his offbeat sense of humor. One would eventually turn him into a vampire. Instead, one of the vampires ripped Leroy’s arm off.

After that, the vampires avoided him. Nobody wanted a one-armed vampire, so there was no sense in turning him. Leroy began to ask awkward questions, like whether his arm would grow back when he became a vampire.

Leroy hung around coffee shops and answered questions about the undead posed by local goth kids. Eventually, he grew comfortable enough in this position to offer his opinion on television shows like Star Trek and Dark Shadows. The local vampires put the kibosh on this after a few months. They turned one of the local goth girls, which made Leroy all the more jealous.

After a minor traffic accident, a witchdoctor put a curse on Leroy, turning him into a zombie. Leroy now directs traffic with his good arm near Whole Foods.

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