Amateur Night!

Below you will find the results of my having challenged myself for a number of days to write a short story with a beginning and middle and an end inside of 30 minutes. Here is what I came up with. I hope you like it.

“So tell me more about your act.”

“I fill my guitar with dangerous fireworks and road flares. They I go onstage and play a bunch of show tunes, really fast, but I change the lyrics so they’re about me trying to fuck Suzanne Pleshette. The heat from the stage lights eventually causes all the fireworks and flares to explode.”

”The audience likes this?”

”How the hell should I know? Most of my face has been burned off.”

”I saw that.”

”Yeah, I can’t really see or hear anything.”

”Um, come by Tuesday.”



“Thanks. Can someone give me a ride home, afterwards?”


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