Oh Yip Yip Yo

Below you will find the results of my having challenged myself for a number of days to write a short story with a beginning and middle and an end inside of 30 minutes.  Here is what I came up with.  I hope you like it.

“I can’t come in to work, today.  There’s a big boa constrictor wrapped around my head,” said Alec K Redfearn, as clearly as he could, into the telephone.

“Eh,” came the reply.  “What’s that, again?”

Exasperation having mounted, Alec hung up the phone.  He tried mightily to return it to its usual place on his desk, but the reptile that had enswathed his noggin like a great, scaly muffler obscured his vision.

“Consarn it,” ejaculated Alec!  “The Eyesores are due to play a show this very evening, opening for Zoogz Rift’s skull at The Columbus Theater.  We shan’t be a convincing act with this jungle demon attached to my dome.  Why I can’t even find my accordion.”

Alec had spent a percentage of the morning trying to remove the snake, which, in its current form, resembled a set of radial tires stacked around a giant pineapple, from his person.  No luck.  The animal’s grip was resolute and tighter than two coats of paint.

“You’d think my old lady would have mentioned this embarrassing situation to me, this morning, ‘fore’n she went off to her incantation seminar.”

A light bulb suddenly appeared over Alec’s head, startling the boa constrictor that so effectively obscured that specific part of his body.

“That’s it!  The boa constrictor enswaddled my skull at some point early in the day, not in the evening.”

That morning, Alec K Redfearn had consulted his Ring Dang Doo to find a more efficient way of conjuring the ace of clubs.  Perhaps this boa constrictor was an unexpected side effect of this particular dark art.

“Only one man can help me!  Yet, we haven’t communicated since I took a shit in his car on a bet!”

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